Friday, February 26, 2010





Sunday, February 21, 2010


They say the world is getting smaller.

(collective "they" being unnamed, but you've heard this all before)

I agree, of course.

Thanks Internet! (trains, planes, and automobiles too)

This is the first "Twitter" Winter Olympics...yes, I too have been glued to the big screen and the small screen--reading what everyone else has to say at the exact same time.

It's beyond fun. It's like a million stars colliding at once (in 140 characters or less).

I've had my own share of tweets too:

loves crazy tappin' plaid Canucks!
Poetry slam!
back to the red maple leaf mittens <3
(Opening Ceremony)

Tie-dyed Hawaiian shirt pattern with orange snow pants? Score!
(Men's Half-pipe)

wants a jeweled-encrusted snake to wear around too...
To quad or not to quad...the eternal burning question
is a bit befuddled by the black/white checkered cowl-neck, vested top...
(Men's Figure Skating, of course)

[I'll refrain from repeating anything related to Apolo Ohno, because I'd rather not let you read my 12-year-old fangirl heart]

But speaking of Apolo, it's pretty awesome when the athletes have (verified) Twitter accounts too. Especially when they update from the games (in 140 characters or less)--before or after competing....

It's almost inspiration and makes me smile.

Our twittering hearts...our shining stars...the conversation constellation is map-able. We have a chart--

is anyone out there? (obviously yes)
Are we alone? (obviously no)


Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Eat Your Heart Out!

your Godiva Chocolate heart!!

(obviously I didn't give up chocolate for Lent)

So you'd think a "Hey, I've got great news" entry would be relatively easy to write, right? (homophone!)

Not so fast, my dear reader (you).

The big Rejection Tuesday (2/9/10) was followed by the big Acceptance Tuesday (2/16/10)...

Yes. It's been about 37 38 hours since that "little" e-mail (little, because it was read via BlackBerry)...completely unexpected--I was thrown for a big ol' loop and found myself doing a strange half-yell which turned into something that sounded like panting!

Me? An MFA candidate in Fiction at a prestigious program?

I promptly re-read...Wandered around in circles, called my Mom (after calling work and letting them know I'd be about fifteen minutes late--but GOOD news was to come)...

I hopped around... More strange half-yelling and then I started texting like a crazy fool. I re-read the tiny screen...and went to work.

Pinch me?

1. A
2. A
3. F
4. G YES!!!
5. G
6. H
7. M :(
8. W :(
9. V
10. V

And as you can see, I still have seven more schools to hear from--which is very exciting and less nerve wracking...of course, I can't go to G without funding, read: a TA position (which involves a successful interview)....FREAK OUT!

But I'm going to revel in happiness for now....HAPPY, HAPPY-ness!

(my Godiva heart is was GOOD...and apparently I'm worthy of possessing hearts... )


Sunday, February 14, 2010

Throw me somethin'...

Or make me a King Cake... (Emeril's recipe)

Whatever we can do to NOT think about "stuff" related to "stuff"... (you know what I'm talking about)

So the cake was made my mom--and it's really more of a sweet bread just glazed and sugared.

Just as promised, the Winter Olympics have held my full attention too!

Way to go Apolo (and JR)! Men in spandex fitted with blades on their feet--bumping and racing their way around an oval made of ice? Whew!

And then there was Hannah and Shannon! But really, watching all the ladies hop-hop-hop down the Moguls course with two flying breaks was fantastic!

Best news? I'm kinda working on something new....write write write!

<3 J

Thursday, February 11, 2010

(It) Will Possess Your Heart

You gotta spend some time, Love. You gotta spend some time with me. And I know that you'll find, love I will possess your heart.

I came up with my favorite analogy when it comes to my Graduate school "game" while in the shower.

This wisdom is all after my first "rejection" (got that under my belt--from my "safety net" school even). The one rejection I wasn't counting on. Waiting to hear from the other nine programs may drive me insane (really) now.


It's like breaking up with someone after a year--right when you were about to move in. After you've made all those plans, and decisions. Dishes? Which couch to use in the extra room. Maybe you even have a dog together.

It's that severe, BECAUSE typically one has been eye-ing a program for at least a year before the rejection comes.

You've looked over their classes, professors...the location. Everything.

You imagine yourself there, together. Hand-in-hand. It's love. And then you're stabbed in the back and kicked in the face in one motion.

*insert appropriate sound/face here*

I have nine programs remaining on my list...

1. A 2. A 3. F 4. G 5. G 6. H 7. M 8. W 9. V 10. V

The great romance is waiting...just waiting...still waiting...

There are days when outside your window, I see my reflection as I slowly pass. And I long for this mirrored perspective--when we'll be lovers, lovers at last.


Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Is All Mad Here!

(but am I really smiling?)

no. not exactly.

I'd call it more of a grimace.

Painfully playing the waiting/wishing game.
Seriously suspended in suspense.

(now I'm all about alliteration & adverbs)

Work is keeping me occupied, until I pull out my Blackberry. Darn you! I have two e-mail accounts forwarded to my phone...

But I thought I heard ringing--I can't miss an acceptance call from XYZ University!

Essentially the ringing is permanent. I "hear" my phone ringing while listening to music. I "hear" my phone in the middle of the night, so I have to wake up and check...would a university call after midnight? What if they want to test my dedication?

Then there is the mail truck. I can hear the mail truck making the rounds while in the shower--I swear! If it doesn't make it before I have to leave for work, I imagine my acceptance letter waiting for the cold dark box. Shivering.

Yes, it's only February 9.

I thought last week was bad. Nope.

I don't know how many more times I can have THIS conversation:

person 1: Have you heard anything yet?
me: No, not yet. It's still early.
person 1: Where did you apply again?
me: *rattling off list*
person 1: Oh? You'll be accepted.
me: Seven of those places have less than a 12% acceptance rate.
person 1: Oh?
me: That's actually less than Harvard.
person 1: Wow.
me: Yeah.


person 2: When should you find out?
me: If I don't have an answer before April 1...
person 2: Oh man!
me: It's the bridge, baby.
person 2: Where did you apply again?
me: *rattles off list*


person 3: Where do you really WANT to go?
me: Who ever wants me, gets me!
person 3: But really, which one?
me: No, really.
person 3: What if they all say YES?
me: Impossible. I just need one...
person 3: But what if two say YES?
me: I might let them mud wrestle for me.

HOW is a raven like a writing desk?


Monday, February 8, 2010


we're wrapped tight
in featherbeds of snow.
Sudden! unexpected--
Here we go.



Saturday, February 6, 2010

they must love me.

Blackberry Sangria?
A million times, OH YES!

Nobody in the lane, and nothing, nothing but blackberries,
Blackberries on either side, though on the right mainly,
A blackberry alley, going down in hooks, and a sea
Somewhere at the end of it, heaving. Blackberries
Big as the ball of my thumb, and dumb as eyes
Ebon in the hedges, fat
With blue-red juices. These they squander on my fingers.
I had not asked for such a blood sisterhood; they must love me.

~~Sylvia Plath

Friday, February 5, 2010

As Easy as 1-2-3

Forward Bends

Warrior II


And I am not saying any of this is EASY, mind you. I am simply showing you three reasons why I can't walk today...don't forget the squats either.

Okay, I guess I can walk, I just FEEL it. Can someone call in "Triangle" to work?

How would that go exactly?

Please excuse me from work today, I over-Triangled.*

*Goddess/Temple pose(d)
did too much Pigeon Pose'ing

Maybe you can't tell from all screamin', but I absolutely adore Yoga. :D

In fact, the Yoga Universe is so small, that I found out last night that my current Yoga Instructor (Goddess) has taken Meditation classes from my first Yoga Instructor!

And the same first Yoga Instructor gives private lessons to a certain famous Yogi when he happen to be in town filming movies.

By power of Namaste, therefore I've Yoga'd with ____________!

Was I up at 3:30am?
Was I singing Counting Crows songs?
Have I checked the MFA Blogs today?
Am I going to work today? But am I off this weekend?
Is it still gray outside?
But is gray my favorite color?
(Yes x 7)

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Follow Me into the Dark!

...waiting for the hint of the spark...

It is only February 4, but I am full-speed ahead on my "freaking out, whilst waiting to hear about graduate school" plan. I thought this intense state of panic could be saved until mid-March.


Last night I spent a fair amount of time creeping (lurking) through the numerous MFA blogs out there. I was comparing "school lists" and looking to see if anyone out there has heard from their school yet.

I saw statistics that I'm glad I didn't see until NOW:

4 programs are harder to get into than Harvard Medical (3.21%)...

2 of them are harder than "regular" Harvard (undergrad 6.04%)...
1 is harder than Harvard Business (12%)...

(which leaves another three programs I applied to which are not on the list)

No one ever said I wasn't a brave (crazy) soul.

Then it was time to lurk/creep through an entire list of programs and when the first acceptance letters/emails/phone calls went out over the last three years...

So now I have my very own chart of dates to anticipate and mourn as they go by (list is in alphabetical order, but I only included numerical order to protect my future home just a little bit longer):

this year? a poetry applicant heard 8 days ago....

2) 2.7.06/3.13.07/2.27.08/3.14.08/3.12.09/3.20.09
this year? no word

3) 2.27.06/3.5.07/3.6.07/2.24.08/2.29.08/2.17.09/3.10.09
this year? nope

4) 2.3.06/2.20.07/2.24.07/1.26.08/2.6.08/2.14.08/2.3.09/2.10.09
this year? not yet

5) 2.21.07/2.29.08/2.28.09/3.4.09/3.6.09
this year? nada

6) 3.17.06/3.10.07/3.12.07/3.17.08/3.11.09/3.13.09
this year? nothing

7) 3.1.06/2.21.07/2.8.08/2.8.08/1.23.09/1.30.09/3.17.09
this year? nope

8) 3.10.07/2.29.08/2.29.08/2.6.09
this year? nada

9) 3.27.06/3.12.07/3.13.07/3.10.08/3.18.08/3.30.09/4.1.09
this year? nothing

10) 3.2.06/2.26.07/3.2.07/2.15.08/2.16.08/2.19.09/2.19.09
this year? not yet

(these numbers came from HERE--see the links on the right side of the page)

So statistically speaking (again) who would I hear from first? #1 (if they are already in the process of accepting)...#4 seems liking too. See? I'm mad.

At least I know I'm not alone in the hell of waiting, but I shouldn't be left alone with Internet access for too long, because you see what kind of mess I get into....PORN? Ha! I wish it was something typical.

Thank goodness the Winter Olympics are starting soon (distractions, distractions).


Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Graduated, now what?

I wait. I wait. I wait. It's the first full week of February and I have...ten (?) weeks of waiting to go:

Reading books (so my mind doesn't atrophy)
Knitting wearables (so my hands don't deteriorate)
Working full-time (so my bank account doesn't...shrivel up and die)
Watching movies (so my mind doesn't give way)
Yoga-practicing (so my body doesn't decline)
Working full-time (see the section above)

I'm pretty sure I just wanted to use the Thesaurus today because I can't tell you the first or last time I ever used "atrophy" in a written sentence.

I had a friend stop by a month or so ago and tell me about her new career as a teacher. We took a class together in the Fall of 2008. She told me that her school was probably going to be looking for a 10th grade English teacher soon...

*insert fantasies about being a 10th grade English teacher here*

There was a conversation about "applying" to local newspapers (the S is a bit misleading, because our print media market isn't gigantic--but it isn't lacking either). Not really sure about the want to apply though...

I know how that business works.

Conversations about what exactly I want to do or see myself doing or what in the world is an MFA have been had with all types of people.


The Australian Open was a great distraction--Federer Reigns and Serena Swings!

Back to waiting for the rejection letters to come (psyching myself out)...
Back to downloading music on iTunes...
Back to ordering birthday gifts waaaay in advance...

The dripping, melting snow may as well represent my sanity.


Monday, February 1, 2010

Janet Torrance:

(special blog edition, straight from work while trapped in a frozen pharmacy over the weekend)

"Light, of my life. I'm not gonna hurt ya.
You didn't let me finish my sentence.
I said, I'm not gonna hurt ya..."


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